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Two Simple Things You Can Start Doing Now To Transform Your Life

by Sueños on 02/09/17



I talk a lot on this blog about the power of perception. This is that we have the ability to control the quality of our life based on how we choose to interpret stimulus. (I.e. you make eye contact with a stranger and you either think they're conspiring against you, or they're admiring how cute your outfit is). While the concept sounds easy it can be very difficult to implement. Here are a couple of tips I give to my clients to help them begin the transformation.

Keep a Gratitude Journal
It can be so easy to get to the end of day and feel like it was a total wash. It was just one of those days that EVERYTHING seemed to go wrong. It's easy to let days get you down, however, if you take a minute to reconsider your day, you'll often find that all sorts of things actually went pretty well. Even if it's just that you have a roof over your head and food in your belly, that's a lot more than most people. This exercise is incredibly useful in re-framing how you interpret your world, and is always a very humbling way to end the day.

Stop Assuming
I talk about this book probably a little too often, but good God it's so marvelous! Don Miguel Ruiz does a deep dive on this topic in his book The Four Agreements, and if you haven't read it, then put this blog post down and go pick it up immediately! The premise of this section in his book is this: how the hell do you know what's going on in other people's minds? Or how do you know what's really going on in that person's life? My favorite example of this is the parent of a teenager. If their kid doesn't call home when they're out, they're certain they are dead in a ditch somewhere. So when their child walks in 20 min. past curfew the parents are so worked up with anxiety that the fight of the century ensues, and their kid walks away totally blowing them off, instead of listening to what they have to say. We can save ourselves so much heartache if we stop assuming. We can avoid the self-doubt that comes from assuming what other people think about it us, and we can eliminate the anxiety that exists in anticipating negative outcomes of events that haven't come to pass yet.

These are two great starts, and supplemented with a meditation and yoga practice, I think you'll begin to notice changes in your life in no time at all. In gratitude we find happiness in what we already have, and in the ceasing of assumption we are able to begin viewing the world objectively. Paraphrased a bit: enjoy your life as it is, and don't let your mind make it into something it is not. 

This is a guest blog by one of our coached Diego-Andreas. If you like this post, and want to see more like it, check out his blog at www.wonderingintomyself.com

The Three Presents of Presence

by Sueños on 02/08/17



This morning I was talking to one of my friends about her plans after she graduated with her degree. Her problems were symptomatic of most post-grads. "How can I find a new job, while staying close to home, and that has a university nearby in case I want to continue my education? What will I do about my current boyfriend?" (She was really working herself up at this point) "What if he can't find employment near where I find employment? What if we both find a job in a city that's far away from my family? How will I make the judgment call?  What if neither of us can find a job  in our field and we're both stuck working part-time near the university?" And she finally finished with,"It's so hard to worry about all of this, while still focusing on my grades, and the job I have now!" Her list of concerns were almost endless, but what I found the most humorous about this is she doesn't graduate for another 6-months.


 Now I am far from type-A, and my procrastination often bites me in the you-know-what, but like anything the key here is balance. When we worry about the future, we are causing ourselves distress based on events that may not even come to pass. My friend was worried about getting a  job in a city that wasn't close to her family, but she doesn't even know if that choice will even present itself. So this first present of presence, is freedom from anxiety. When we are focused on the current moment, we are not worried about hypothetical issues that may not even occur. Instead we are able to use that mental power to take full advantage of the moment we are in. This is certainly easier said than done, but what I find most helpful is conscious assignment of the thought as being useless. Quite literally when I have an anxious thought I think, "This is an anxious thought based on an event that has not yet come to be. I will not allow it to have power over me." When I do this I notice the thought tends to disappear, even if I had been rolling it over on my head for hours.


The next present comes when no longer allow the past to affect our current experience. I can't count the number of times I have heard my clients say they were incapable of doing something, based on an experience that bares no relevance to the current moment. For a long time I myself could not bring myself to speak to women I deemed /too/ beautiful because in High School I had been unpopular, or at least I hard perceived myself that way. What's so troubling about this is that by allowing our past to dictate our present, we often limit our capabilities. In order to combat this I recommend a similar solution to how we fight anxious thoughts. We must consciously label it as maladaptive. 


The final present of presence comes as the result of our other two practices: full commitment to our conscious experience. People have so many different names for this, flow, zone, focus, etc. but really what we're talking about is putting 100% of your cognitive ability into the present moment without previous bias or attempt to predict the outcome. You are simply being in the moment that is currently taking place. This is where your peak performance lies.


So do not worry about what is to come, and do not kick yourself over what you could have done better. Instead be grateful for the moment you are currently experiencing, and express that gratitude through the complete and unbiased observation and reaction to it. You will find your life is much less bogged down by worry and anxiety, and that your expression is honest and sincere.      


This is a guest blog by one of our coaches Diego-Andreas. If you like this piece, and want to see more like it, check out his blog at www.wonderingintomyself.com

HOW ARE YOU DOING WITH YOUR NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS?

by Sueños on 02/07/17


What happen to your New Year's Resolutions?  Are you still on track?  Have you embraced the new you? Is your company off to the start you planned. If not what happened?  Many times even with the best of intentions just the thought of changes scares us so.  We have well established habits. Weather it is how we run our lives or our companies.  And we go back to what we know, what has worked before, what is safe.   This is why New Year Resolutions are so difficult to stay true too. It is like trying to round the basis while keeping one foot on first base.  It doesn't work weather launching or growing your company, advancing your career, or following your passion in new directions. The question you need to ask yourself is, "Are you going to stay on first or round the bases and score?"

Meditation: My Daily Pep Talk

by Sueños on 02/06/17

Have you ever had one of those days where you wake up and something feels a little special about today? It's hard to put your finger on it, but everything just seems to go right. You start the morning by making the perfect breakfast, then notice you caught the eye of that special someone on the elevator this morning. Oh and the big presentation you've been worried about all week? You nailed it. Your day ends so perfectly that all you can do is lay in bed and smile. Well what if I told you, you could feel like this everyday? All you have to do each morning is take 20 min. to listen to yourself think or meditate.


Now of course there are almost an infinite amount types of mediation, but I recommend one that involves some sort of visualization exercise (see links below). These types of meditation are incredibly powerful in their ability to assist you in actualizing your goals. How? They allow you to live your day with decisive action by eliminating fear. It's in this state that you see solutions rather than obstacles. You're able to stay centered, and adjust your mood to fit the room.


It's in this state that I find my peak performance. Instead of being reactive, I'm being proactive. What does that mean? Here's an example. During my early years of college I worked in a high pressure sales environment, selling cell phones. My numbers were earth-shattering, and I often finished well above the performance goals. The key was not to wait until the customer asked to see product XYZ, but to anticipate what they might need. "It isn't every day you spend $150 setting up a new phone sir, make sure you're doing the best to protect your investment. Why don't you just LOOK at some of our phone cases." Instead of asking what people need from your product, TELL them what they need from your product. 


This principle doesn't just apply to sales either. Living proactively will allow you to build stronger personal relationships, business relationships, it reduces the stress you feel from procrastinating, and it's all because you woke up that morning and meditated. 


Recommended Meditations:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZoqD2BeFQtk


And for those mornings that are a little rushed here's a 10 min. mediation.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WYP_W49o1vQ


PROFESSIONALS JUST LIKE ATHLETES NEED REST AND RECOVERY

by Sueños on 02/03/17


Saturday mornings were always mornings of after a week of travel and rushing from one meeting to another.  I finally could enjoy a leisurely cup of coffee and read the morning paper. It usually was a late morning which blended into an afternoon of personal errands followed with an evening of entertainment activities.  Sunday would follow as a morning to catch up on household to do's only to spend the rest of the afternoon and evening with catching up on-emails. My new week had formally begun.  This went on weekend upon weekend, year upon year.  I never could catch my breath.  I was drained from the week only to start my week drained from the weekend.I knew it could not go on indefinitely.  It was not sustainable. I was making continuous withdrawals of energy without ever making any energy deposits.  I realized I had to change my habits. It takes continuous deliberate effort to change habits. I had to disconnect from my week of energy expenditures and utilize the weekend to reconnect and recharge. . I started making time for quite time. Quite time with nature and quite time with the one's I love.  Long walks along the beach or in the mountains allowed my mind to synchronize with the rhythm of nature.  Nature's energy has a the ability to humble and put in perspective your priorities. You absorb nature's energy through your senses stimulating your biochemistry to produce higher levels of serotonin, placing you in a low positive energy state. Low positive is where creativity lives. This is why I normally come up with my best ideas during long walks in nature. 
Quiet time with the one's you love is the strongest energy of all.  Love lives in high energy state, biochemically you are at elevated levels of epinephrine and serotonin.  This is where you can leap tall buildings with a single bound.  Now you are ready to start the week, take a leap.