Three Things We Can All Learn From Facebook Arguments
by Sueños on 05/17/17
We've seen them, we've been in them, and we've all had our phones come close to vibrating into another dimension because of them. I wish I could say I've excused myself from them when they tread into the ridiculous, but I, like so many, have taken the tempting bait of vilification. So, what can we learn from these often toxic threads to help us think more critically and stay centered?
You Aren't Your Beliefs
So often when facebook discussions begin they start rational, and then quickly descend into ad hominem attacks about what special type of idiotic person the other person is. It's a mentality, I believe, brought about by a certain owning of one's beliefs as part of who they are as person. "People who believe XYZ are good, and I as one of those people, am good. People who believe otherwise are categorically bad people." It's a certain clinging to that which feels good, as opposed to a search for what is true. I too have recognized instances of this within myself, in fact, I think we all have done it. Abandon your ideas as your image, and, rather, allow them to stand on their own. Criticizing of such things allows them to stand stronger, if they are true, and adapt closer to that which is if they are not. This kind of thought process is essential to avoiding things like group think, and, more importantly, key to maintaining a level head when questioned about your beliefs.
You Don't Always Have to Be Right
Even if you know you're right, even if every scientific journal in the world published multiple studies affirming your position, you don't have to be right. Now, I'm not saying that people shouldn't be corrected, especially with the rise of fake news, but why waste your time trying to force someone to believe what you believe after they've been presented with the facts? If they've been presented with the facts, and are completely unwilling to change their position, in what way are you going to change that? Those who believe that which is ineffective or untrue are doomed to suffer the consequences of such beliefs. Your life is too precious to waste it on those who stay willfully ignorant.
Educate, Don't Belittle
Too often someone's entirely logical argument is completely discredited because the person feels personally attacked. The truth has a way of holding its own power, and your disparaging words, even if correct, can rob it of such. Many people want to be well informed, but when personal attacks are the barrier to such, they immediately discredit the new information.
I think remembering these three things can not only help us better navigate the quagmire of online discussion, but also help us engage people in discussion more effectively in general. Whether it's politics or the best way to conquer a logistical issue, we can all make more effective decisions by putting our egos aside and discussing our ideas as they lie.
This is a guest post by one of our coaches Diego-Andreas. If you like this post, and want to see more like it, check out his blog at www.wonderingintomyself.com
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